Relationship experts and Huna philosophers all think blame and criticism is the #1 reason why relationships fail. Most couples split up, family members stop talking or business partnerships fail because one or both of the parties gets tired of being blamed or criticized.
What is the best and quickest way to stop it?
When you're blaming someone, what you're really doing is pointing the finger at them and saying "Hah! It's your fault. You're wrong." Then, that person typically comes back and says, "No, it's your fault..." and this can go on in an endless loop.
To radically shift out of a blaming consciousness in 1 minute or less, try this tip from Gay & Katie Hendricks:
When you catch yourself starting to blame or you're having critical thoughts about your partner or colleague, make a pleasant "Hmmm...." sound. And what this does is it shifts you out of your "critical" brain into your "wonder" brain.
So, you can say to yourself, "Hmmm... I wonder what I could learn from this." Or "Hmmm... I wonder how I'm contributing to this situation."
When you do this from a place of sincere wonder, then an immediate change takes place in your connection with the person you were previously blaming or criticizing.
Try this the next time you have a critical thought, and watch real miracles open up in your relationships! And of course, work on keeping your heart chakra open to love and compassion - listen to my free Chakra Meditation at www.thechakras.org.
Namaste! Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra Diaries
What is the best and quickest way to stop it?
When you're blaming someone, what you're really doing is pointing the finger at them and saying "Hah! It's your fault. You're wrong." Then, that person typically comes back and says, "No, it's your fault..." and this can go on in an endless loop.
To radically shift out of a blaming consciousness in 1 minute or less, try this tip from Gay & Katie Hendricks:
When you catch yourself starting to blame or you're having critical thoughts about your partner or colleague, make a pleasant "Hmmm...." sound. And what this does is it shifts you out of your "critical" brain into your "wonder" brain.
So, you can say to yourself, "Hmmm... I wonder what I could learn from this." Or "Hmmm... I wonder how I'm contributing to this situation."
When you do this from a place of sincere wonder, then an immediate change takes place in your connection with the person you were previously blaming or criticizing.
Try this the next time you have a critical thought, and watch real miracles open up in your relationships! And of course, work on keeping your heart chakra open to love and compassion - listen to my free Chakra Meditation at www.thechakras.org.
Namaste! Becca Chopra, author of The Chakra Diaries
